The last post I put on my blog was two months ago. I haven't put anything else there because I have been consumed by my job. WHAT THE FUCK?? I hate it and when I get home it is all I obsess over. I try to think of ways to improve my performance, try to reach the women I supervise, try to make a difference. I have lost sleep, sex drive, and creativity over this shit. And this Friday it dawned on me, there is nothing I can do to change it.
It is true, people that work for the state are often the worst people to employ. They are known for being lazy and stupid and making things much more worse. When most people start working for the state, they want just a job and they are usually directed to where family works. People that work for any state agency are not thinking of how they will improve the world, just about the retirement, paycheck, job security, and vacation.
That is true for where I work. When I was promoted to the position I hold now one of the people I supervised transferred, leaving a vacancy. I was not allowed to be involved with hiring this replacement. I was too new and no one wanted to "burden" me with this task. I tried to be involved but was rejected. The person they hired is an idiot. She has no concept of managing a caseload, cannot prioritize, and is mean. I have tried real hard to teach her but it was rejected. The other lady I supervise is more stupid, lazy, and is a dinosaur. She fits into one of those protected categories, a category that is not based on the content of character.
It has been an uphill battle with these two. Since the beginning, I have leaned heavily on my supervisor for guidance and direction. I want to do it right, I want to be effective, I want to make a change. I have done everything he has suggested, and I have often done things repeatedly. Every effort has been fruitless. A few weeks ago my supervisor proved true to his reputation: a two faced, back stabbing idiot. I didn't want to believe it, I wanted to believe that I was different and he would not do that to me, but he did. I was hurt by it but was much more disappointed in myself for not seeing it coming. This Friday, it confirmed it even more and has given me more answers.
I was talking with him about one of the women that work for me. She tries everything to get out of her work. I had been absent the day previously and she went to him whining about some work she didn't want to do. And he bought into it. He gave her what she wanted. I was frustrated to say the least. I was sitting there talking with him about it and he was stating that she does this all the time and he now understands how other people have had difficulty with her. AND HE DIDN'T GET IT!!! HE GAVE HER WHAT SHE WANTED, HE LET HER CIRCUMVENT THE CHAIN OF COMMAND AND HE HAS BEEN DOING THIS WITH HER FOR AS LONG AS SHE HAS BEEN THERE.
That is when it dawned on me. Not only have I had to battle with the new and mean idiot, and battle with this dinosaur that resents not getting the promotion I received, but my supervisor has been undermining my authority with these two women since day one. He is more than two faced, more than a back stabber, he is a horrible manager that has no concept of his inability, short comings, stupidity, and how easily he is manipulated. That all she does, stroke is fragile ego and he does what she wants. Not only does he does this with her, he does it with our "clients". He is more than stupid, he is dangerous and doesn't realize it.
So no wonder it has been hell. Why would you listen to someone when you see that no one listens to them? WHY? He has laid the groundwork for mutiny and can't see what he has done. He has done it for years.
What an idiot.
So, after my revelation what can I do? That answer is: leave. Talking with him doesn't work, I have done it before and he doesn't listen. He is never wrong in his mind. Working with the women is fruitless, it has been nine months with very little progress. Let them fail.
When I took this position I did it only to progress, gain experience and move on. I never intended to stay. I had said I would stick around for a year but I don't feel that I should be held to that if they fail to uphold their end of the deal.
The first chance I get, I am gone.
So, everything you have heard about state workers is true. I know it doesn't put me in a positive light but it is honest.